My involvement with God this week wasn’t nearly as
prodominent as it was last. I feel like I missed out on ample opportunity to
spend time with the Lord and the strong intentions I had to do so, fell by the
wayside. I let my own thoughts roll around in my head and I spent the majority
of my time thinking them through without asking for much Heavenly guidance.
Though I can’t say my thoughts were far from God, they were scarcely given to
Him and the intimacy I put aside was certainly missed.
A few things happened
this week that could have used some more Godly attention. An upset friendship,
a disapointing job situation, and an incident that can best be described as theft.
As I voiced my desire for Christ to help me in these affairs, I quickly realize
that I spent more time talking about them to others than I did discussing them
with God Himself. In times like these I am thankful for the Spirit interceding and the truth of God knowing exactly what we need before we say a
word. Despite my neglegence, Jesus has faithfully been by my side. He has been
working on prayers hidden in the corners of my mind and revealing more reasons
to trust that He is listening. More reasons to fearfully love Him.
A couple months ago I
started praying for an elderly gentleman who needs a little more attentive
care. I haven’t been redundant in this prayer but every now and then I remember
to include him in my conversations with God. Because this man was hesitant to
the idea of different living situations, I asked for Jesus to soften his heart
about moving and that He would lead him to an environment of deserving love. I
am still hopeful all of this will come to fruition but in the meantime I praisefully
report that this gentleman shared his desire to now move into a care facility.
Wow!
I am amazed with how
God can use anything and everything to speak. Just when my discussions grew
light, He delivers this distant news of encouragement. Just when I start to
drift off into my own thoughts, He calls my interests back to His. Don’t get me
wrong, I still spent time with God this week, but it was more in the way of
reading about Him rather than speaking with Him, and I’m continually learning
just how important conversation is. Not only did Jesus respond to an infrequent
prayer of mine this week, but He also answered a pretty familiar one too.
After months of prayer
and chremo a friend of mine was deemed cancer free on Wednesday. My friend put
his faith in Christ and though there were moments of uncertainty, doubt, anger,
and fear, the Lord granted him the request of being able to thank everyone for
their prayers. His desire to visit with ones that had given him so much support
beat out the cells that were killing his body. My friend now has the
opportunity to further his growth in the gifts that God has given him and
glorify our Father for His attentive love. An attentive love that never ceases.
Thankfully, God’s love
has been reigning all over this life. He has dilligently been answering prayers
that call for great joy and reminding me that our relationship is of highest
priority. However, I’d be lying if I said I never got upset with the answers
Jesus provides or the way He allows for certain things to unfold. There’s no
telling why some prayers are answered the way they’re received while others
seem to have no affect in the world, but I’m reluctant to say they don’t. I’m
reluctant to think that any prayer goes unheard and that God doesn’t answer
them all one way or another. Because I trust that Christ is working all things
together for the good of those who love Him, it’s a little easier to be content
in the confusion and saddness. It’s a little easier to see past the closing
doors and focus on the ones He’s opening because I know that He wants nothing
but the best for His children. He wants nothing more than their heart.
These past few months
I’ve had my fair share of both open and closed doors. I’ve been upset by some
of the Lord’s reponses and joyous of others. I’ve had prayers answered swiftly
and am still waiting for others. Through these engagements I can see how the
Lord was (and is) asking for more of my heart. I can see where my best interest
comes into play and the struggle I have for realizing it’s not me that knows. As
I work to ask God for more of what He would want, there’s no shortage in the
the way I see Him needed and no confusion to the necessity prayer has in our
lives. There’s no doubt that Christ is interested in hearing from each one of us
and that He desires for all people to be
saved, coming to the knowledge of truth.
What’s weird about
having a relationship with Jesus is the way we keep that truth alive. I’d like
to think that once we’ve found our connection, it’d be easier to maintain. I’d
like to think the freedom of a life with Christ would keep us from revisting
the prisons we fled from. But life’s funny like that and simply knowing just isn’t
enough. While I look forward to the upcoming opportunities I have to spend with
the Lord, I thank Him for His renewing mercies each day. I seek to have a steadier
relationship with God and ask for help in surrendering my thoughts to Him. I
pray that God continues to make it easier for me to be intimate with Him and
that He allow for follow through on my good intentions. May He give us all
Heavenly guidance, knowkedge of His truth, and a deeper love. I pray these
things in the powerful name of Jesus. Amen!
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